Confession of a Lost Writing Soul

Confession time. Yes, I'll confess... getting ready to confess. It's gonna happen. Right about now.

Okay, okay. I'm getting there. GEEZ!

Here it is. I have no clue what I'm doing anymore and I'm overwhelmed. Drowning doesn't cover it. Not even close.

There, happy now?

My workdays are starting to hit 9 and sometimes 10 hours a day. Of course, mommy and wifey time takes up most of the remaining hours. And then there's reading.

What's left is for writing. I mean, I am a writer after all. I'm published and everything.

But, that means less promotion time for those published babies of mine, and less time for the more fun side of talking up fellow author's books I read. (There are so many SFR and SF books I've read lately that I want to shout out to you all about on my FB fan page.)

And my geek fests! Oh, how I've missed my geek outs! There's a list a mile long with topics and science "stuff" I want to check out, look into and blog about to get your opinions.

I've made sure not to impact my family/friend time. I've done this by dedicating those peak hours to them, which means my work day splits, 7 or 8 am to 5 pm and then 8 pm to 9 or 10 pm. That there, folks, is the me time I've sacrificed, and it is time I took some of it back.

I have a plan...

(Boy, isn't that usually the thing people say before absolute disaster befalls them?)

Whatever, I'll risk it. I have a plan. It is time reclaim some of it and pull back on the work hours I've been slating.

I mean, what achievements will I be most proud of when I'm 80, after all? Will it be the hours of personal and family time I gave up on projects quickly forgotten as the next five pop up? Will those lost hours make me most proud when I look back on my life?

Or will it be the stories I wrote, characters I created and mental space journeys I took?  Or the other authors and great books I read and promoted? How about the science I learned and discussed with friends?

I think those things will make for better geriatric memories, if I don't come down with Alzheimer, that is. So my plan is simple:

Workday ends at end of work day. 8 pm to 10 or 11 (or even midnight on) is my time. The time for me, my characters, and my fellow writers. The time for my science and technology wandering and musing.

For my moonlighting gig as a writer. As author A. R. Norris, aka the SF geek and former marching band tuba player.

That is my call to action.

(Heehee. Betcha never read a call to action that included "former marching band tuba player" in it, have ya?)

Aren't I just a cliche...

Currently, I sit at my kitchen table leaning over my iPad typing furiously. It's manic at this point, and a wee bit unfocused. Meaning that it's not on anything tied to a deadline.

Only moments from now the clock will strike the ominous midnight. Admittedly, midnight is not as ominous at 3 am... the witching hour. The remaining hope my chicken heart has now is that I will be fast asleep before that hour hits, or else I'm screwed, I'm sure.

In hindsight -- it's always in looking back that the obvious is, well, obvious -- I should have seen this incident coming. Woke up thirty minutes late, rushed family through morning routine and barely got my coffee in time for first teleconference of the morning.

Felt a little dizzy but pushed through until meeting with one of my long time mentors where I nearly fainted in front of her. Working at a hospital, she properly diagnosed me with not only the need to see my physician but also as being a jackass for not keeping up on my post cancer monitoring.

Being the childish creature I am, I went to my primary instead of my oncologist where I learned I was merely having a reaction to my allergies, which had compounded my post cancer symptoms. Felt righteous until my primary doc confirmed my mentor's diagnosis of being a jackass.

From there is was home with treatment to stem the waves of my new dizzy world. I promptly took my dose of medicine and entered the world of the dead... or at least the temporary world of the comatose.

Long story short (a phrase which I never got, because it's really short story long), here I am at *gasp* two minutes to midnight unable to sleep because I took a 4 hour round trip to Comaville.

Oh, I promise you, I tried to go to bed, but then nature tantalized my writerly side by bringing this magnificent wind. I lay in bed listening to it and drifting off into the icy, crevice-filled planes of Europa with the majestic Jupiter dominating the horizon.

Then I was on the beach; my favorite beach.  That sound called to me before I'd ever stepped foot in California. Once my bare toes sunk into the sand, I knew I was home. Funny how sometimes home isn't where you were born and sometimes where you've never been.

So, anywho, as I mentally shifted to the beach, this thought whispered in my mind:

"The wind blew as waves rolling eternally, never reaching shore. There was something sad and forlorn about that reality, for it is the wave's destiny to break along the shoreline, dissolve back into the vastness of its home and be reborn. Possibly into a mighty storm."

I lay there for minutes trying to ignore it but found myself writing it down in my bedside notebook with a mechanical pencil almost out of lead. And only a quarter hour after that, I sat at my kitchen table writing.

I know, I know, the whole experience is all very cliche. I guess cliches sometimes are cliches for a reason.

See you all tomorrow. I'll either be dead on my feet or over-wired from coffee ODing.

Still Get Surprised

Even as a plotter, I still get surprised by the story. No matter how much I plot, and outline, and plot, the story just keeps secrets from me -- It reminds me I'm not really running the whole show. I'm just the puppeteer and my imagination is the puppet master.

Sometimes the character leaks the secret when I'm laying in bed in the middle of the night, or even in my dream. Sometimes it's after I've been furiously typing and go back to actually "take in" what I've typed.

The latter is how I felt at the ending of Revelations of Tomorrow. I stopped typing, wiped tears away and reread it to really see why I was crying... and then cried all over again.

And, again, the latter is what happened to me the other night. This time, though, my brain split and I had an internal conversation between Mini-Mental AR and  Subconscious who, for the record, was still typing away.

"Whoa... really?" Mini-Mental AR scoots anxiously forward to the edge of her admittedly imaginary seat.

"Really," absently replied Subconscious.

*Clickety, clackety, click, click, click on the keyboard in the distance.*

"Are you sure? I mean, I thought--"

"Wrong. You thought wrong."

*Clickety, clack, clack, click.*

"But--"

"Shh... I'm busy."

"Yeah, but--"

"I said SHHH."

*Clack, click, click...*

I can't reveal what the -- er -- revelation was, I'm no story spoiler after all, but I will say I was blown away. I thought--oh, yeah, not a story spoiler. Damn it!

(This is like when I saw what present my mom and step dad were wrapping for one of my siblings and I had to keep my mouth shut for weeks.)

Yes, I'm a Little Tease

I was so excited at my editor's first pass with the prologue to IIA Book 2, The Naga People I had to share it. You rock Carolyn! Remember this isn't the final version and changes could be made. (There, disclosure - er - disclosed.)

For the quantum agents of the Interstellar Intelligence Agency, their moment of realization to the quantum kinetic ability is usually through some heightened moment of distress around the time they hit puberty. For Becka, it was when her planet was destroyed and everyone she knew was killed with exception of her brother who was thankfully at college.

*     *     *     *     *     *

13th Day, 3rd Month, 2993 G-Year
Above The Planet of Anemoi

Becka Utiv gazed down, staring in horror as Anemoi folded under the large asteroid.

For a split second, a mere glimpse, it appeared the magnificent ice planet would devour its enemy. Its body swelled but held together, whole.

Then dark fissures of crust spread along the white crystalline surface like veins denied circulation. It was then she knew her home was gone as the point of impact began to break, splitting open and crumbling under the unstoppable force of the hell ball.

I haven't earned entrance to The Glorious End.

How could she have, if the gods above forced her to observe this nightmare, helpless to do anything but watch from the stars?

She'd obviously died.

How else could she be formless, without a physical body? She'd separated from reality and was only a wisp of spirit gazing down at the trauma her people faced.

But no sound.

So, Father was right. Nothing but empty, quiet terror out here in the cosmos. She'd expected the collision to have a torrential rage of sound to match the visual apocalypse happening before her.

Father... both he and Mother were down there. Her grandparents, uncles, cousins, friends. All dying as she hung over viewing, unable to do anything to save them. Becka tried in vain to move through space, but she had become part of space. There was nothing to move.

A southern chunk of her planet flew up through her, past her, beyond into the depths of space.

"You must return to the physical world, Becka."

The Voice surrounded her, comforted her, infused within her.

Who are you? Are you The Great One?

A soft chuckle from an external source resonated through Becka's spiritual being.

"Far from it, Child."

I don't have anywhere to go. Anemoi is gone. Forever gone.

Grief rippled throughout the universe around her, surprising her even through her turmoil.

"Go to your brother, Becka. Go to Andrew."

How...?

As impossible as that sounded, her brother's apartment slowly began to replace what little remained of the universe at the atomic level. It was at first as lucid as a mirage but gradually solidified. In her peripheral consciousness, just out of full reveal, her angel stood poised in almost-complete silhouette, except for its red eyes, which gazed steadily toward her.

With a nod, it pointed towards where her brother entered in from the kitchenette, and then itself dissolved back into the nothingness of the universe from whence it had come.

*     *     *     *     *     *

Hope you all enjoyed the little tidbit. I absolutely can't wait until this releases in June! I wish I could share the cover, which I have, but I haven't been given permission quite yet (partly because I was in too much of a hurry to share this with y'all to double check whether it was okay or not).

See the insect, be the insect



GE Hadiman - Source: Adifruit Industries



Exoskeletons aren't just for insects anymore. As we humans are so good at, we've modified nature to our own benefit and adapted the concept to assist us in various areas of our lives. And this technology has come a long way from GEs bulky 1960s Hardiman robotic suit.

Exoskeleton technology can be made for the whole body or partial body. They use sensors and controllers to power hydraulic-driven components to overcome the limits of the human body.

Alrighty, so three main fields come to my mind when I think "exoskeleton tech": medical, industrial, and of course military.

Medical Application

It's always nice to start technology posts with areas that benefit humanity as a whole and not just for advancements of new toys to kill the enemy better and faster. Because of this, I'm starting with the medical field.

Ready? Okay, here's my opening statement for this section: Exoskeleton advancements will tremendously improve the quality of life for many patients.

Pretty snazzy statement huh? Awe-inspiring, prolific and all that jazz...

Cyberdyne's HAL suit, which is already rentable in Japan for the elderly, is hailed as a nursing-care suit and designed to detect appendage movement and guide the motion in a natural way. So, if you have weakness in your arms and can't fully extend it, HAL will finish the motion for you. It also helps balance you and stabilize yourself as you walk or climb stairs. (Source: Popular Science)



HAL - Source: Cyberdyne



Although there are pretty cool exoskeleton body-bracing systems out there for paraplegics, I was really drawn to the prototype out of Berkeley California, the Austin, because it's actually affordable for a larger population. (Source: PC World)

Industrial application

Okay, remember the payload exoskeleton from Aliens? (Man, Ripley was one of my favorite female heroines!) Well, think that but less bulky... and less kick ass and you've got the modern payload exoskeleton systems for use in the industrial setting.

Panasonic's Powerloader Light, for example, helps the user carry an extra 88 lbs and shifts weight as needed to counteract the walking motion. (Source: Hightech)

Military Application
Last but most certainly not least, DARPA has been funding the development of this technology for military use since at least 2001. And for those of you who don't know what DARPA is... well, you're just not paranoid enough and beyond my help.

As of 2010, it was down to Raytheon's OXS 2 and Lockheed's HULC super-soldier suits. With these suits, soldiers can walk or run for hours, carry loads up to 200 lbs effortlessly, and lift up to 500 lbs or more without breaking a sweat. (Sources: Popular Science, Hightech-Edge)

As a mom of a son getting ready to join the Marines in mere months, I have to say this interests me greatly. Now if only they could beef up their superman tech to dodge bullets I'd be a happy camper.

Little side trip: this dodging bullets bit might be happening with the breakthrough of nanotechnology. A nanotechnologist at the University of Texas has developed a way to chemically grow nanotubes like tiny muscles. The micro particles contract with voltage and are energized by hydrogen and oxygen. These things are 100 times stronger than human muscle tissue, and when woven into fabric become a second, stronger "skin" for soldiers that can stop bullets. (Source: Spiegel)

How cool is that?

For some reason, this reminds me a tad of Robert Heinlein short story, The Beast, where the animal he's tracking on a remote planet turns out to be an escaped engineered human fighting machine who'd lost his humanity.

So, there is my little geek trip. I haven't had a to use this in one of my stories because I mostly write far future stories where unmanned military technology reigns.

Choice is Made

Last week, after my flight was cancelled, I sat at one of the working tables. There my mind began to wander. Naturally wander into the realm of my writing mind.
So, any-who. As I sat in this deep mind-wander a beautiful pitch-black man appeared out of a mental darkness. Seriously, a true black the color of fresh laid tar. Some mysterious soft light hit him and a midnight blue sheen flickered off his skin. Eyes, tinted by a hardened coating of some sort, began to glow orange. His body was unimaginably flexible, bending in ways not natural to normal humans.

This was Aleron, the agent for the next IIA case, book three. I guess my mind made up which story to do after False Salvation is finished.

I knew the next story would involve a life vessel, where the residents lived permanently on the ship. The case needed an agent acclimated to a zero-g environment, and what better one than someone born and raised in zero-g?

Perfect, right? My thought to. But it poses some challenges. First and foremost is what is needed in a human species that lives in space. (Yes, I've decided to make them a separate species instead of an ethnicity due to their interaction with and distance from other humans colonies/worlds. Within this human species I'm thinking of having 2 to 3 races, depending on how the research pans out.)

Aleron's species was genetically engineered centuries ago for life in no gravity. They're skeletal structure was modified so most of it is a special thick cartilage. What bone is left is super dense with little to no porous state. Their skin is thick and darkened to bounce off space's gamma and UV rays. Instead of eyelids, they have a special coating that protects their eyeballs from damaged, and again fights off the pesky gamma and UV rays. One of the coolest parts -- that I'm still working out -- is their modification of both inner ear and neuro receptors that manage their equilibrium and dexterity.

There's still a bunch to finish figuring out in this character's specie, aside from the storyline itself, but that's what's so exciting... the challenge is ON!

So, what is the most exciting research you've included in a story?

Writerly update

So, Naga People is now complete and with the editor. With that story done, I've moved on to my novella project that'll be included in the Borealis anthology Desert Breeze Publishing puts out.

I'll admit, I'm a little nervous. I've never written within someone elses constraints before...well, I stick (somewhat) within the constraints of known science, but I mean I've never written within another writer's fictional world. Oh, hell, you knew what I meant.

"Quit trying to unnecessarily explain things, AR."

Where was I? Oh, yeah, sticking within another writer's constraints.

Talk about pressure. Right now I think I'm doing okay. We'll see I guess.

Oddly enough, even though I was excited about it, my "muse" fought coming up with ideas. I think it's the perversely defiant side of me that resists any kind of conformity. (Pfft...this coming from the now suburban mom of 4 who works in an office job for "suits".)

Anywho.

I found a title for it, False Salvation. It's a young couple love story, with both the main characters being barely adults and very naive. Another first for me. I'm finding their romance very cute and hopeful.

And yet another first for me is that this is the first story where there's not a motherly figure of some sort. Veda, one of the woman there to help them escape Borealis, is tempting me to evolve her into a motherly role of sorts but since they are strangers and this is a novella, there isn't really time.

The pleasant surprise is how fast this one is going. I'm so used to 80k - 100k stories that this novella is already almost drafted.

After this I'm taking on either a story about one woman's battle in the afterlife or the third book in the Interstellar series. Both sound appealing at this point. In the first I want to manipulate and explore the myths and folklore surrounding post death. It'll allow me to bring in some the horror and more speculative elements I like. In the latter it'll be in a galactic life boat and I'll be able to explore the concepts and theories behind that. Another element I like to write about.

*tips hands back and forth like a balance* Science or speculative. Science or speculative. Choices, choices.

Hopefully I'll know when I get there. So, what have you all been up to?